Where would I be? -- Brian Darnell

Lighting a candle

Lighting a candle                                                                                     

I saw the Friend shining in your eyes.

Beheld by His kindness,

my heart and body remembered

the holy companionship

my mind had worn out and misplaced.

I heard my silent Master in your throat –

voice and laughter – stepping daintily,

for a few moments outside time’s flow.

I felt the touch of the Friend

in the softness of your eyes;

His unwavering good spirits

in the cup of your smile.

Anew, I experienced

the awe and reverence

I had frittered away over the years –

(down to the last scraps and tittles) –

recouped by the posture and demeanor

of your body humbly kneeling before His chair.

Lighting a candle with a candle

in the heart of this late autumn evening.

O child of God, your Beloved comes to you

in countless and ingenious, multifarious ways.

Your side of the river

Your side of the river                                                                     

You back me up against the river

and I have to herd my sensibilities

toward Your still waters, make my way back

to the heartland, the fertile soil and furrowed ground.  

I know that other territory well – across the river,

that dark wild which can feel like truth;

the black depths of the exhausted quarries.

You drive me to the river and leave me there,

to find my own way back. 

Up against Your silence,

my interrogations come to naught,

the compromises all on my side

Your orthodoxy and improbabilities

without pretext left unexplained

and yet I cling to You ever more tightly

and praise You for my half-filled cup

on this extraordinary path I reluctantly,

at times, traverse on Your side of the river.

O child of God, conviction is a gift of the Master.

Faith, in the interim, is an offering of the lover.

                                                Drawing by Rich Panico